Review: Zyllion Shiatsu Back and Neck Massager with Heat

I think this is stated in a fun-loving manner, but I hear this often from a much younger friend who is in their prime: Age is just a number. While I tour with this friend, he might be casually speaking, while I, on the other hand, may be riding the fine line between an all-day steady state pace and blowing up. On those occasions, I ask plenty of questions and listen, speaking rarely to maximize oxygen intake. If you, like me, don’t find age to be just a number, this is an excellent strategy to employ as you ascend with the younger folks.  

Up to a certain point in life, the saying age is just a number is likely true. Where this point lies, who knows? But, generally, the point where age tilts toward not being just a number is in one’s late 40s. Of course, the fulcrum I’m speaking about varies from person to person. For some of us, it is a slow-drip decline, while for others it is precipitous. So that one dude in the Tetons that is in his mid-50s and climbs and skis 8,000-meter peaks with young folks and sends 5.14 (a, b, or c?), he is my hero, but damn, he’s an outlier.  

So, is age just a number? I think not. I’m reminded after most tours that a repaired knee with no meniscus feels ancient. Which is saying nothing about how I ski with more trepidation in less-than-ideal conditions, for fear of blowing the knee out again. 

But let’s pivot a bit. About four years ago, I went on a hut trip with Rob Coppolillo. (I think of Rob often and how much easier this whole print endeavor would be a ton easier with him to assist….) Ok, so there we were, after a week at the Sunrise Hut outside Golden. And to be clear, I do have some miles on this body, as did Rob. So we were both a bit knackered. We dug the car out once we were dropped off by the heli, loaded up, and I distinctly recall Rob and me sort of groaning a wee bit as we sat in our respective seats. 

“Dude, grab this,” said Rob, as he handed me a portable massager, plugged it in, and presto, I was transported. Rob had handed me a plug-in Shiatsu massager. Specifically, he handed me this (warning, it’s a long name),the Zyllion Shiatsu Back and Neck Massager with Heat—3D Electric Kneading Deep Tissue Massage Pillow for Muscle Pain Relief.

With such a long name, you’d think it would cost more than a Benjamin. Rob said it was less than $60. And it was. And it still is.

To cover our bases, here’s how the American Massage Therapy Association describes Shiatsu: Shiatsu is a traditional, holistic Japanese form of bodywork that focuses on restoring balance to the natural flow of energy in the body. In Japanese, “shi” translates to finger, and “atsu” means pressure, meaning shiatsu literally translates to “finger pressure.”  

I’m going to allow Zyllion a bit of leeway here. This massager, which, as advertised, seems best suited for the neck and back. I’ll take some liberties; it’s also suited to anywhere you can apply bodyweight pressure to the device. However, it is not as precise or nuanced as the pressure one can apply (or feel) from the fingers. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a Shiatsu massage, so my baseline is, maybe, a bit off. 

To replicate fingers (or hands), this Zyllion device has four rotating heads that heat up, cycle round and round, then switch direction every minute, all while pressing deeply into your muscles. The heads are neither sharp nor totally benign—they are shaped with slight bevels to reduce any edges digging too deeply, and the amount of pressure applied correlates directly to how much you lean into the device. I’m going to concur with the marketing, the heads do knead deeply. And the best part is that it is relaxing. 

“No, Rob, I’m not ready to share the massager,” I hear myself say, like a toddler, when Rob asks who else wants to try the robo-massager. 

This device is not to be confused with a massage gun. I tried one of those. No matter how much I tried to convince myself I was helping loosen my fascia and “recover,” I found the process, the noise, and even holding the “gun” totally unrelaxing. It became another thing to do after exercise, which all began to feel like work. I handed the massage gun to the older child, who, I think, finds it more tolerable than me. 

This is all about finding something more tolerable. And who doesn’t want to restore balance to their body energy? I mean, really, unbalanced chi is no way to start or go through any day. Here’s my assertion: While I have zero data to support this claim, I think the Zyllion Shiatsu Back and Neck Massager with Heat—3D Electric Kneading Deep Tissue Massage Pillow for Muscle Pain Relief makes me a better person. 

The massager runs for 20-minute cycles, then auto shuts down. And, oh man, those 20 minutes are deep-muscle-release goodness. Who’s not better after that?

I think it’s probably antithetical to rate chi restoration, but if I am allowed a momentary pass, I’m giving this massager a five out of five for chi restoration. And can you imagine one of those sites that do “best of” listicles, listing the “best” chi restoration devices? That’d be blasphemy, so we’re not going there. But, if we did, the Zyllion Shiatsu Back and Neck Massager with Heat—3D Electric Kneading Deep Tissue Massage Pillow for Muscle Pain Relief would rank right up there. 

I am indebted to Rob for his good advice. My chi, whenever it feels depleted, is easily restored. 

Stats

Head Count: Four rotating heads that heat, knead, and penetrate deep into muscles. 

Power: Arrives with a power supply for a two-prong outlet and a car adapter. Yes, you can use it while driving, just remember to remain alert. 

Chi Restoration: No promises, but it’s likely your chi will be more balanced, and, at a minimum, somewhat restored. 

Community Use: Honestly, it’s tough to share this deep massager post-tour. It’s doable, but tough. 

Price: Under $60